Sexy Black Hair and Other Things I Can't Help but
by siriusly klutzy
Summary: Being bad at Arithmacy is one thing. Being bad at it because you're bad with numbers is another. But being horrible at it because you got caught staring at James Potter when you should be taking a test really takes the cake.


**Summary: Being bad at Arithmacy is one thing. Being bad at it because you're bad with numbers is another. But being horrible at it because you got caught staring at James Potter when you should be taking a test really takes the cake.**

**Disclaimer: JK Rowling, people. Come on. If you don't know that by now you're... crazy. :D**

**Sexy Black Hair and Other Things I Can't Help but Notice**

a Siriusly Klutzy story.

"Ms. Evans, please be so kind as to take your eyes off of the back of Mr. Potter's head, and start your examination," were the horrible, horrible words that haunted me for a week.

Because you see, no one was supposed to know that I was staring at his hair. On a good day, I can stare into oblivion (or into the back of James Potter's head...) without being noticed. Being a fairly good student helps, it's a concentration thing. The fact that I did it during Arithmacy (notably my worst subject) blew my apparently not so subtle cover. Professor Vector has it out for me, I just know it. 

I mean, how does she know I wasn't just thinking?

Because of her mortifying comment, I was completely embarrassed resulting in a P on the test. In all honesty, I would have failed that thing not only if she hadn't said anything, but even if he wasn't in the class. I'm rubbish at Arithmacy. Too much to do with numbers for my liking. 

"So, Lily," Alice said in a sing song voice when we walked out of the class. She was smiling wickedly. Not a good sign. "What'd you think of the test?" she asked, still in sing song.

"It was... all right," I said carefully, waiting for the blow of "You were staring at James Potter in class!" to come. 

"I thought so, too," she said grinning like the loon she is.

"There was the problem. With the numbers. That one was difficult..." I said stupidly, trying hard to avoid the subject (and obviously failing miserably as I had no idea what we were doing in class this past week or what we took the test on. I hate being peer pressured into taking classes I didn't want to take in the first place.)

"Oh yes," Alice said knowingly. "That one was rather difficult."

"Yeah."

"Yeah."

I could see in her eyes that she was bursting to say something, but she's a decent person (though sometimes I'm convinced otherwise...) and kept her mouth shut because approximately four paces ahead of us were James and the others. Who could no doubt overhear everything we said. 

Keep it casual. Good, Alice.

Even if she was smiling like a loon. But they can't see that. 

We stayed quiet until we reached the Common Room. We were dropping out bags off before lunch and then coming back up here for our free period. My thoughts unconsciously drifted. Until I received a sharp blow to the arm that is.

"What?" I asked, rubbing my upper harm fiercely. Alice hits hard. 

"You were doing it. Again."

"Doing what?" I asked, completely unaware of the horrible situation I put myself in. 

"Staring at Potter."

I froze. Indeed I was. I could almost see the hole I burned into his school shirt from where I was looking. Ugh. 

You see, let me explain. I've liked James Potter for, oh, about three weeks now. Of course, he's barely acknowledged my existence. I've only been caught staring three times. This one time in lunch while he was eating a peanut butter and fluff sandwich, in Arithmacy, and just now by Alice, who of course knew everything and was trying to get me to save face by directing my "desirable needs", as she so nicely called them, elsewhere.

But it's not my fault. Besides, I only look when he's facing the other way so it's not like we ever make eye contact. I just have a nice view of his messy hair, his nice back, his oh so lovely bum, his gorgeous legs and all the other things I can't help but notice.

It's. Not. Fair.

"So," Alice said when we were safely in the Common Room. It was loud from the chatter that was going on, not easy to be overheard.

"Professor Vector has it out for me," I grumbled.

Alice nodded. "He looked pretty pleased though."

"Did you have to add that? The whole classroom noticed. They all know. This is not going to end well, I can feel it." 

"Just go push him against a wall or something," she offered with a shrug.

"What?"

"And snog him senseless."

"That'll keep up the good image I've worked to hard to maintain."

She scoffed. "Everyone knows you want to do it."

We were in the dorm now, and I had dropped my bag on my bed.

When we reached the Common Room, there were only a few people left.

Including the Marauders who I tried not to make eye contact with. Because would you want to? After being caught by your teacher staring at one of them? 

I think not.

"Evans!" I heard Sirius call when Alice and I were three quarters of the way to the door. I cringed.

"Yeah?" I called back, not turning. Alice was smirking wickedly again. I wanted to poke her in the eye.

"You've looked long enough. Do you think James should stick with the shampoo he has now? Or get a new one that makes his hair more glossy?" The group started towards us.

I cringed again.

"Keep it," I wanted to say. "It makes his hair look very attractive like that."

I could feel the 'K' on my tongue, but I coughed and said, "Erm, I don't know." 

Alice was laughing silently next to me.

"Go do it," I heard her whisper, making me blush.

"It's alright, Evans. We all know that you fancy James, here. It's about time, too. My guess was last April, but that didn't work, obviously," Sirius said. Remus smirked next to him. 

Ah April. Spring, doesn't it sound lovely? New beginnings and all that jazz?

Try getting one thousand purple carnations. One. Thousand. Seems bad enough, right? Try walking into your dorm after an extremely long day only to find that you can't collapse on your bed. Because you cannot find your bed. Because it's surrounded by one thousand purple carnations. 

"I smelled like carnations for two weeks!" I pointed out, still not making eye contact with any of them. 

"At least you didn't smell like feet," Peter said, and then he went into a thoughtful stance as if reliving a memory.

"I... guess?"

"If you don't snog him senseless this instant," Alice started, "I will!" 

I turned toward her and raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I won't. It's just a figure of speech. But _you'd_ better!"

She gave me a shove forward.

Which wouldn't have been so effective had James not been walking towards us, bumping me into him.

I. Wanted. To die. _Die_. 

But I did the first thing I thought of.

Which was push him against the wall in the entrance way. I was off my rocker, I know.

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that I snogged him senseless, aren't you?

Guess again.

"Oh, fudge stick," I said after realizing what I'd done.

"Fudge stick?" Alice asked from behind me.

There was absolutely no way to get out of this situation.

James was standing there, a little confused but mostly smug. His arms were crossed in front of his chest (which was very nice looking, by the way) and there was a smirk playing on his face. 

"You shouldn't change your shampoo," I said, blushing more than I'd ever blushed in my life. Seriously, if you put me in a can of red paint just then, you wouldn't have been able to find me.

"No?" Oh boy was he trying not to laugh.

"Erm, no. You should leave it. Because, erm, because..."

"Because it doesn't smell like carnations?" Alice offered. She was smiling like mad.

"Sure..."

That was when I started to wonder why my hands were still pressing him against the wall.

But then that thought was cut short when I thought I'd put on 3D glasses because James Potter's face was soaring towards mine.

I know my eyes went wide, and Alice giggled. Sirius was saying something about sending purple carnations to some girl in Ravenclaw.

When he pulled away, I was in shock. I mean, wouldn't you be? 

I almost started giggling and babbling actually, but I was cut off by Sirius.

"Aren't you glad you wore my lucky pants this morning, Prongs?"

**A/n: Hey guys, I thought of this randomly. Actually, when I started, it didn't have any sort of plot. I just figured that would be an embarrassing situation. And it went downhill from there. But then it went uphill. It was...interesting.**

**Hope you guy liked it!**

**Much love and the hope that you'll be wearing 3D glasses around James,**

**Siriusly Klutzy**


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